thecrimeshop

Tribute to Jody Bouffard – Blush & Blu

Cristal M Clark 

Each year on Pride Weekend, I try to pay tribute to someone from the LGBTQIA2S+ community. Although I am straight, I live in the community here in the city of Denver, and I love this community the best. I personally have never felt more accepted, welcome or safe as I do when I am anywhere members of the LGBTQIA2S+ community happen to be gathered. 

I do not go out much these days but I might step out of my comfort zone and see some of you at Pride this weekend. I moved back years ago, in fact I could just step across the street a few paces and be over at Blush & Blu. Maybe stop in to see Jody if she is still slinging drinks. Alas, I still have social anxiety, but if Jody and her crew taught me anything, the LGBTQIA2S+ community is safe, welcoming and just fun.

This year I would like to pay special tribute to Jody Bouffard Owner of Blush & Blu. Jody might not remember me and  well this was many years ago, closer to the time she first opened the bar as the story goes. I lived in the yellow house across from the Squire which at the time was a complete shit bar, scary, rough and it always smelt of urine. Well I think it still does but you get the idea. 

I had been through one of the most horrific abusive relationships one could have gone through and had been moved to the yellow house to keep me hidden from a very dangerous and deranged individual. I tried going out to straight bars and it was traumatising so much so that for months I kept myself isolated in my tiny apartment in the yellow house. I don’t recall who it was that I met at the corner gas station but this woman looked at me and said “You look like you could use some time out, stop over to Blush and Blu.” I honestly had never heard of the place, I looked it up and saw that it was a lesbian bar and thought maybe just to be around others I could do it? After all my therapist told me to try to socialise. The only thing that scared me, was that I did not think that a straight woman would be accepted at the bar, I wasn’t their to get a date or to hook-up and I was straight. 

It took a good month before I worked up the courage to go. When I did I met Jody, I would go with this big ass laptop as if I was working (and although it does not seem that long ago, guys the laptops back then were about the size of a Pinto automobile). I had a punk hair style, short and always one eye covered, the ends of my hair were super flipped out..I was pretty rocking back in the day folks.

I was so nervous and at the time I was not really drinking, part of my therapy, I would only order a coffee. I kept thinking they know, she knows the owner of the bar knows that I am not a lesbian, they hate me, they are judging me, she is going to ask me to leave and not come back just as I started feeling safe…

I could not tell you what it was that she saw but Jody became one of my first lesbian friends ever. I believe deep down that she knew that I was damaged, hurting and just trying to connect with people, women, someone of the same sex, I was so traumatised by men, I had such a hard time being around them.  At the time due to the constant moving around until a trial was over, I was strapped for money, I couldn’t afford much either. Jody never once charged me for a coffee, when I tried to pay, she would not take my money. When I had some spare money I would leave her a tip, it was never much it was just what I could afford. 

I have never forgotten the kindness, the fact that every one in Blush & Blu just accepted me for who I was and how it felt safe to be there. I have never forgotten the impression that Jody left on me, that’s probably why she is one of the characters in my book, yes I made a character based on Jody in a book I wrote, she influenced me in such a positive way.

No one pried like they did at other establishments, I did not have to re-live every nightmare, I was just welcomed, people talked to me like I was a person, an individual, they did not care that I was straight, hell maybe they all could tell how broken I was, I do not know. What I do know is that I have a huge amount of empathy for the many struggles and slights that the LGBTQIA2S+ community has had to endure, I have a huge amount of love, and a huge amount of respect. I am Gen X, most of us live by the live and let live rule, most of our generation, not all does not judge or care, most of us though, we accept all. It wasn’t until my eyes were opened that I learnt that was not good enough. And the person to thank for that is Jody Bouffard! 

You have done more than you know for not just the LGBTQIA2S+ community but for a great many others and you never knew how deeply you touched anyone and someone like me.  Don’t think that I know better what this community has gone through, no, Jody opened my eyes to it. She made me realise that simply being a Gen X type someone who believes in the live and let live is just enough. It’s not. It never will be, I have not lived your lives, I was afraid that you would not accept me, but that pails in comparison to what each and every one of you have actually lived. It’s easier for me to be accepted by you than it is or was for you to be accepted into this world. And that hurts my heart, deeply and profoundly. I have not lived it, yet it hurts me.

Jody, thank you for everything you did for me all those years ago, you touched my soul in a way that others could not, and you were the friend that I needed even if you didn’t know it at the time. I have never forgotten you, I drive by when I go to Sprouts on the weekends and I always remember all that you did for me and how deeply your kindness touched me. Thank you Jody you will always have as special place in my heart and will always be my bad arse sister from another mother. 

Guys Happy Pride Weekend. 

Cristal M Clark 

https://crimeshop.org

IOS users can find The Crime Shop on Apple News

@thecrimeshop on twitter

https://www.instagram.com/crimeshop.cc/?hl=en

https://www.facebook.com/cristal.marieclark

https://steemit.com/@thecrimeshop

Late Fall 2024  Elon Musk – A Boy With A Dream

A tale of Fiction Written by Cristal M Clark